Since losing my Dad I've spent sometime talking to a counsellor about bereavement. It's been a good way of talking through my thought processes and relieving some of the stress and tension. She made a comment to me very early on which a couple of months later I wanted to explore. "In Britain we don't…
Happy Birthday Pops!
Yesterday would've been Poppa M's birthday, last year we marked the occasion as it was the first one since he passed. Nothing too special, we just had his favourite curry for dinner and my mum came round to join us. We chatted about him and had a laugh, to be honest as the first of…
You learn who your friends are
The title may sound negative, however it's not meant that way at all. When you go through 2 of the most challenging and life changing events that I've focused this blog on, you learn who your friends are. Now, yes when my Dad died I had a fair few people who I did feel let…
Me time.
10 weeks in and I finally bit the bullet and did it! I ventured out on my own without Baby P, don't worry she wasn't left unattended, I asked her to stay home and babysit her father! Partly due to breastfeeding I'd not yet left her but also mainly because it put the fear of…
A visit in my dreams
Last night my Dad came to see me, he sat on the sofa and cuddled and played with my little girl like any doting Grandad would. Then I woke up and the realisation that it was just a dream hit me hard like a cold slap across the face. Just over a year on I'm…
He wasn’t superman, he was just my Dad…
I was watching a documentary on George Michael and he was asked how he would’ve like to be remembered and this made think about how I want to remember my Dad and how I want to describe him to my daughter. Truthfully, that’s how. I don’t want to portray my Dad as Superman or a…
That day.
Writing about the day my Dad died is a strange feeling. I've known deep down that I wanted to post about it but haven't been ready to for awhile and I don't know that I am now but the words have started to flow and I feel this sudden urge to, so I'll continue. I'd…
Caught off guard.
Grief is a strange process, you have good days and bad days, ups and downs and rotate around a mix of every emotion going. I've being living by the mantra, one day at a time, waking up each morning and facing whatever particular feeling it is I'm faced with that day. Sometimes though, it's not…
A sensitive poem.
I've found this blogger's poem about losing and missing someone, it reminded me that the feeling won't go away, I'll just learn to live with it. Cindy's reading What really struck me about this poem was that it is about the loss of a child. I'm not a parent myself yet, however I have a…
Back to Reality
At some point you have to get back into 'normal' routine, at some point you have to stop living in a grief bubble and you have to go back to work, back to routine, back to hobbies, you have to get back on with 'normal' life. Only it won't be normal (what is normal anyway-I…
Learning to Cope 