One of my most popular posts is about not letting anyone tell you that you can’t do something, but often I find that person is me. Don’t get me wrong there’s times in life when someone else makes you believe you cannot do or achieve something but that’s only really because you allow them to. It’s really you, you’re telling yourself that and allowing their words intensify the feeling. It’s your own lack of confidence and anxiety that’s stopping you from trying to achieve something.
This hit home to me, I follow one of my favourite writers Gavin Oattes on various social media platforms, as an ex-teacher and straight taking down to Earth bloke his writing resonates with me. On one of his pages recently someone commented about “who said that?” and it stayed with me. Their point was that when you’re worrying about something, when the negative voices in your head are telling you something is going to happen, think logically to yourself, “who said that?” and suddenly rationale thought comes back into play.
It’s true, try it! Next time you’re saying to yourself, “I’m not going to pass this assignment” (yes that was my resounding thought pattern for the last few weeks) or “I’m not going to get the job,” “that I’m not good enough for the main part” or “they don’t think I’m good enough to play in the first team” whatever it is you’re saying, ask yourself, who said that? Because I can bet 9 times out of 10 it’s something you’ve fabricated yourself.
We’re good at that aren’t we? As people were very good and dreaming up things that could cause us issue, things that might happen, insecurities that have no real ground or substance to them. And when you break it down to who said it, it’s usually you. I’ve being doing a lot lately and it does work…to a certain extent, I’m also sometimes good at arguing back and finding ample reason for me to not pass the course…all said to me by me but I’ll get there. It’ll take some practice but if I continue to keep reminding myself that no-one said that, that it’s something I’m insecure or worried about and isn’t actually based on any decent rhyme or reason then I’ll slowly stop being the daft worry wart that I am.
Repeat after me, “who said that?”