My daughter is my superhero. If it weren’t for her I wouldn’t be who I am and quite literally she’s saved my life.
Being a single mum is hard work, becoming one isn’t an easy decision. I was married and had made conscious decision with my husband to have a daughter but it was that conscious decision that saved me. Being in a marriage like mine is hard and I loved my husband so much I always hoped and wished things would get better, I put my all into making things work and sometimes cried to my mum that I needed someone to give me the strength, the push and the force to walk away. Deep down I knew it wasn’t going to get better but something kept my clinging on to hope that it would.
Then P came along.
Everything changed when she came along, not in respect of the marriage and our relationship but my resilience. My acceptance and tolerance altered. What was once ok for me to put up with now wasn’t, well actually it wasn’t ok for me to put up with either, it wasn’t ok for anyone but now I wanted more and better for her. I didn’t want her subjected to the negative situation. So one day something finally clicked.
One day enough was enough, I didn’t plan it, I just suddenly got this strength, it was like that morning baby P woke up wearing a cape and underpants over her baby grow. She gave me the guts to leave and drive off looking back in the rear view mirror and know that neither of us were ever going to be hurt or upset for those reasons again.
Her super powers don’t just stop there though, yes she saved my life and gave me the guts to walk away with dignity and pride. But she’s also given my the strength to stand tall, overcome the lasting emotional effects of what we’ve been through. She’s made me reflect on myself and my lifestyle and make it better. She’s made me make better choices, in practical things and in emotional things. I’ve made better friendship choices, I’ve made better routines, decisions at work, thought patterns and self care. She challenges me everyday. She tests my patience and makes me question lots of things, but all for the right reasons.
My daughter is my superhero and will continue to be because she brings out the best in me. I owe her a lot, not materialistically and not in terms of spoiling her or letting her have her own way. I owe her love, guidance, support, boundaries, firmness and life lessons. She saved my life so I owe it to her to give her a good one.